


Suave Home of International Evil

by Daegaer



Category: Weiss Kreuz
Genre: Assassins & Hitmen, Friendship, Humor, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-10-13
Updated: 2014-10-13
Packaged: 2018-02-21 00:44:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 291
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2449046
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Daegaer/pseuds/Daegaer
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Schwarz discuss the next day's plans.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Suave Home of International Evil

**Author's Note:**

> Originally written for the 2011 Squee Fest _Book of Squee_.

"Schuldig, you're on duty tomorrow morning, Nagi in the afternoon, Farfarello, you'll have one of your bad spells so you can stay home all day --"

"Score," Farfarello muttered, getting out the TV listings.

"And I'll deal with the Masafumi problem that'll arise at lunch time," Crawford said.

"I want to stay home," Schuldig whined. "I'll melt Takatori's brain if I can't stay home."

"If he's staying home, so am I," Nagi snapped.

"No one except Farfarello's staying home!" Crawford said. "Got it? Schuldig, Takatori will have a hangover and he'll be exceptionally rude to you. Bring a bag of candy to distract yourself. Nagi, one of his aides will try to feel you up. You are not - _not_ \- to kill the man. Is everyone clear?

"Fine," Schuldig muttered.

"Fuck that," Nagi said quite audibly.

"If you kill him, he won't be around to take the fall for the murder Farfarello will commit on Friday," Crawford said patiently.

"I'm going to murder someone on Friday?" Farfarello said with interest. "Work or pleasure?"

"A bit of both," Crawford said. "It's a priest acting as an MI6 spy."

"This week's getting better and better," Farfarello said happily. "Can I have some Pocky, Schuldig?"

"Strawberry or chocolate?" Schuldig said. "It's all pretty gross. I think my experiment in homemade Pocky using Schnitzel was a bad move."

"You disgust me," Nagi said. "Can I have a Snickers?"

"Yeah, they're in my dresser, underneath all the bags of M&Ms," Schuldig said. "Knock yourself out, kid."

Crawford sighed. It was like herding cats, only slightly less satisfying. Schuldig shot him an irritated look and tackled him.

"Who's got the tickles then?" he demanded, pinning Crawford down.

All in all, it was a fairly typical evening _chez_ Schwarz.


End file.
